You can save your custom pipeline order as a preset of the module order utility module.
https://docs.darktable.org/usermanual/3.8/en/module-reference/utility-modules/darkroom/module-order/
If you set that preset to auto-apply, you can basically override darktable’s defaults. I’m not sure if you can include it in a style, and I’m not at my desktop now. If I remember correctly, there’s a Lua script you can use to apply styles automatically. Maybe this one?
https://darktable-org.github.io/luadocs/lua.scripts.manual/scripts/contrib/autostyle/